We were half a block away from the door when Raines stopped. Gave me a look. “OK, Mom,” he said. “I’m going to do that teenager thing.”
I stared at him, blank. What teenager thing?
He gestured down the block. “I’m going in there by myself,” he said, smiling down at me, kindly. Oh, god — his smile was almost pitying. This was my first tip off. I braced for what was coming: “Let’s just hug here…and then I’m going to walk to the door without you. OK, Mom?”
We’re a very affectionate family. And my boys have never — not once — shied away from giving me a kiss and hug goodbye on the school playground. In front of their friends. I’ve never insisted on this (maybe joking around once or twice?), but the whole hug goodbye has always been…just…a given? So much so that it’s not uncommon for their friends to swoop in for hugs too. Obviously joking around, but still.
Except this was his first day of high-school orientation, so I smiled a bright smile, “Of COURSE, Raines!!!” and gave him a quick hug. One of his buddies walked up, and I watched them do that hand-slap/back-pat thing men do and walk away.
We’ve reached a level of independence that is making my head spin. He is such his own person now, and I find myself endlessly fascinated by this tall, handsome stranger with his own thoughts and opinions and experiences that I (apparently) know so little about.
I’m starting to understand what my mom tried to explain years ago, after Raines’ first birthday, when I was sobbing about “how old” he was getting. When I was feeling panicked by the thought of our little world expanding, seeing just a downward spiral of my own self, one where this precious little creature — one who was so connected, he felt more like an extra appendage, like my own arm or leg or heart — would need me less and less.
“They do need you less and less,” my mom said. “But, Shana, it’s wonderful too. Just being around them — just talking and laughing as adults. It’s wonderful,” she gushed again, laughing at my stony face. “Honey, I promise.”
I walked back home after dropping Raines off, feeling both proud and sad. His little brother, Pax, was waiting for me. “How did it go??” he asked. “Did you go inside?” “Nah,” I said, explaining what happened.
“WHAT???” Pax was indignant. “HE DIDN’T WANT TO HUG YOU IN FRONT OF HIS FRIENDS? HOW COOL DOES HE THINK HE IS? ‘CAUSE, MOM, HE IS NOT THAT COOL!!!!”
And then Pax wrapped me up in a giant hug and whispered in my ear that he would never, ever do that to me — never ever (!!). And while I definitely know his time will come, it dawns on me that this is maybe why you have more than one kid.
Thank God for little brothers.
HOLD THE PHONE. My beloved GANNI boots are on sale???!! Almost sold out, but…hang on…YESSS: Saks actually has a few really solid options in the sale section, once I dig a little deeper. Try my exact GANNI boots in a lighter color, a similar GANNI pair in my exact color (but with a shorter shaft) or, for a very similar look, these Philip Lim boots, which are also on sale.
Two Great Bags, On Sale: This Nanushka pleated-leather (vegan leather) clutch is the sexiest thing I’ve seen in a while. I have a similar piece from Clare V., and it’s both wildly practical AND outfit-making — one of my favorite purchases ever. And while my Staud bag that looks like some sort of cool flowerpot (see it here) is long gone, J.Crew just came out with a very similar piece. Such a great shape — people cross the street to ask me about it.
Which Ugly Shoe? I can’t decide between the UGG Ultra Minis in Burnt Cedar and Birkenstock Boston clogs (shearling-lined, obvi) in Stone Coin. And if you say both, you are NO HELP. (But hmmmm….I’ll prob get both.)
Stunning. This washable silk cropped cami from Everlane is jaw-droppingly gorgeous on. It completely aces the understated-but-chic vibe. I have the size 2, for reference. It pairs perfectly with Everlane’s Way-High straight-leg jeans (if you care, Tumbled Indigo is MUCH softer than Salty Water).
French-Girl Lips: I’ve been a longtime fan of Saie Beauty’s lip balm (your lips but better), and it recently came out with a product called Lip Blur that looks like a sort of almost-lipstick. I can’t decide on the color, though, so I might actually splurge on the two-pack. I definitely want Modern Rosy Nude and either Nouveau Midtone Brown OR Surreal Raspberry.
I don’t roller skate, but…if I did, this pretty pair. I’ll bet they’d make a really sweet gift too.
Ahhhhhhh… I first fell in love with Guerlain’s Aqua Allegoria scents in Paris back in 2003. Happily, one of the duty-free shops we were wandering around between flights had the full line, including the newest one, Mandarine Basilic. It’s very citrus-forward but really warm too and smells like a summer day. This exact scent has been around for years in a lighter version. The update is a bit stronger (side note: None of these are “strong” — the whole line is flirty, as in a make-you-want-more kind of way) and is bringing me SO much joy during these end-of-summer days. Nordstrom has a decent selection, if you want to see other options, but Macy’s is the only one that’s currently carrying my favorite stateside.
Tell Me No. Because I’m really, really tempted by these wild pants.
Not *Exactly* For Kids… We picked up the game Ransom Notes, and it’s HYSTERICAL. A few of the prompts are decidedly NOT kid-friendly, but our guys are basically teenagers now, so, whatever. Anyway, it was a laugh-so-hard-you-cry kind of game.
A Week’s Worth Of Outfits: In our special Tuesday newsletter, I’m on deck for this coming week’s My Everyday Edit. If you haven’t yet joined, well…we’re pretty darn fun. Subscribe here, if you’d like.
I’ve been striking out on books lately. Any recommendations???
Happy weekend, gang. Enjoy these last few days of August.