What We Actually Want For Mother’s Day. In 2020. While Quarantining.

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When we brought up Mother’s Day at a team meeting a few weeks ago, it was met with groans. Surprisingly, the groans weren’t just mine. Mother’s Day — even in a pre-COVID world — is often a day of un-met expectations, and, given the state of the world, we were inclined to just ignore it.

What We Actually Want For Mother’s Day 2020: A Quarantine Wishlist

But as we talked, it turns out there are things we want for Mother’s Day. In general, we all seem to want food brought to us, and some of us (especially those of us with small children) would like…the children brought…somewhere else.

And since I’m a firm believer that the Universe Will Manifest What You Desire…As Long As You Have Written Down Exactly What You Desire And Also Sent That Written Missive to The Spouse Responsible…here we all are.

The 4 Things I Actually Want For Mother’s Day

Mother's Day 2020: At home. In quarantine. Here's our wishlist of what us moms actually want: acts of service, pretty gifts, time, space & more.

1. Breakfast in Bed: Mike had started a pretty epic Mother’s Day breakfast in bed years ago (coffee, pastries, flowers, art from the kids)…and I LOVE it. It’s easy, it’s fun, and it makes me feel loved and appreciated. I may upgrade my PJs this year (these or these) and add a new throw to protect the bed (the boys crawl over me like puppies), but this is, hands-down, my favorite way to wake up on Mother’s Day.

2. But…ya know…planned in advance: I would, however, like some aspects of my Mother’s Day breakfast planned in advance. While I’m so happy to read alone in bed while they scurry around downstairs…waiting hours while Mike dashes out for supplies because he forgot it was Mother’s Day, or the hastily scrawled cards in gray crayon (because that’s the only one they could find in the 3 seconds they spared to look)…isn’t, uh, ideal. GENTLEMEN. I will buy the things…but the art and homemade cards are allllll you.

3. A Clean Patio: I recently asked two of my friends who have gorgeous patios how often they cleaned them. Their answer? EVERY DAY. Ah. This explains much about ours. So. I’d love the patio swept up, hosed down, dried off, and cushioned so I can putter around out there with my Kindle and a drink.

4. For extra credit…I’ve been living for our weekends where we escape somewhere outside. Hiking is our current obsession, but as the weather warms, I have high hopes for long bike rides or even [S crosses fingers] a trip to the beach? A girl can hope. We’ve yet to buy actual beach chairs, but these Clare V x Anthropologie ones (with matching umbrella!!) are calling my name. SO CUTE.


Laura’s Actual Mother’s Day Wishlist

Mother's Day 2020: At home. In quarantine. Here's our wishlist of what us moms actually want: acts of service, pretty gifts, time, space & more.


1. ALONE TIME. Alone time. Did I say alone time? Maybe AirPods would help with that, too. 

2. Flowers Flowers Flowers. They’re saving my mood right now. And distracting me from a messy house.

3. Speaking of a messy house…I would love my family to clean for me! Haha. We’ll see. We need a new vacuum. As boring as this is for Mother’s Day, I think it’s time to upgrade. At Amazon | At Dyson

4. Something chocolate and delishlike this


Scotti’s Actual Mother’s Day Wishlist

Mother's Day 2020: At home. In quarantine. Here's our wishlist of what us moms actually want: acts of service, pretty gifts, time, space & more.

1. Time on the deck. Alone… Preferably in the sun with warm temps. (Can you make that happen?) Sitting in a cute and comfy chair–ooh, like this one!

2. A margarita (or two) made by my husband… he makes the BEST margaritas because he squeezes fresh citrus into regular mix. (He uses this citrus squeezer to make it easy!)

3. Something pretty: I LOVE this necklace and I’ve been wanting a personalized one for awhile. This is dainty and pretty and perfect for every day. (And I love supporting companies that support other women like ABLE does.)

4. Happiness & F-U-N. I don’t want anyone pulling hair, pinching, pushing, crying, whining, etc., I want dance parties and smiles and laughter and no discussion of Corona . . . unless it’s the beer (preferably the light kind).


Cams’ Actual Mother’s Day Wishlist

Mother's Day 2020: At home. In quarantine. Here's our wishlist of what us moms actually want: acts of service, pretty gifts, time, space & more.

1. SPACE: Mental, physical and emotional space. How can you give this to me? Go away…and take the kids with you (love you, babe. Kisses!).

2. FEED ME: My love, you are so good at this already, so can’t complain…but more than any other day (aside from my bday…and any other day, honestly)…I do not want to cook.

3. COMPLIMENT ME: I know you’ve read about the Love Languages. So, this is my top one. Words of Praise are my jam, so…please. Tell me all of the ways that I am the Queen and, by all means, list out all of the awesome things that I do.

4. One GIFT wouldn’t hurt, I guess. I have been drinking a lot of iced coffee recently, so…this Sip Sip Straw Tumbler would be lovely. Also, if you want to get CRAZY…throw in this Rachel & Vilray vinyl (love a good, cool jazzy sound…especially with vocals!). Okay, okay. One more? Fine. I am actually really into these head vases (sounds weird) right now.


Julieta’s Actual Mother’s Day Wishlist

Mother's Day 2020: At home. In quarantine. Here's our wishlist of what us moms actually want: acts of service, pretty gifts, time, space & more.

1. SPACE: I was feeling guilty for not wanting to celebrate with them first thing. But gosh…I need silence, a clean space, my favorite books, and food. My introvert self is suffering.

2. HOMESCHOOLING AND CLEANING BREAK: I want a card that says: “2 teaching days off. Don’t worry about cleaning bathrooms and laundry this week.” — That says ‘I love you’ more than any gift. Have you guessed my love language already? 

3. LATIN PARTY IN THE LIVING ROOM: I want us all dressed up (kinda) dancing to our favorite Latin Music. Maybe we’ll get to practice the salsa lessons we were taking before this happened and teach our kids to dance. 

4. OK, Maybe a gift: I do need a beautiful robe like this coral one and could always use a dainty gold chain necklace to layer with the others I have.


Em’s Actual Mother’s Day Wishlist

Mother's Day 2020: At home. In quarantine. Here's our wishlist of what us moms actually want: acts of service, pretty gifts, time, space & more.

1. My toes are begging for a pedicure. I don’t mind doing them myself — I’d just love to be able to do them uninterrupted, during daylight hours, maybe with a smutty show on the iPad and a fancy candle flickering away (we’ve literally burned through three of these candles in the past two months. The scent smells like you just stepped into a spa…but sultrier).

2. Pretty please, make the beds for a week. Both of them. And they don’t have to be made the way I would make them — they just have to be…made. Ok no wait, that’s a total lie. You know how I like the pillows, so maybe do…them…that way. 😉

3. Kiddo art. The peanut is going through this creative growth spurt at the moment, and it’s just the best. She also made a cake from scratch today, no recipe, choosing the ingredients and quantities herself and doing all the measuring, mixing, etc., I won’t even tell you how much better it turned out than many of my cakes. (Lemon cake with marionberry buttercream, if you’re curious.) So, yeah…I’d also take one of those.

4. And if a gift is on the table: I’ve been eyeing this dress for weeks now. It’s pure gorgeousness, yet totally easy and would absolutely be the kind of thing I’d wear for (future) Mother’s Day brunches out. Maybe with this necklace, which is so dainty and perfect for everyday wear (would be so sweet with Lana’s name, too).


A’s Actual Mother’s Day Wishlist

Mother's Day 2020: At home. In quarantine. Here's our wishlist of what us moms actually want: acts of service, pretty gifts, time, space & more.

1. No More Shared Custody: Queue the divorced, co-parenting, custody sharing tears for those that feel them too? I don’t want to share on Mother’s day. Nor, I dunno, for the next 10 years? I want the kids, all the time. There, I said it. Too much to ask? Probably. For everyone? Nope. Instead, every day they aren’t here, I pick up this book, because books on the subject of divorce and coparenting just depress me. I page through it until I find something I can rest my crazy mind and hurting heart on, something that resonates, and then I just think that thought. Because, hey, it’ll all be ok, I just need to be reminded of that until they come home.

2. No More Pandemic Nor Kidney Disease: If you give me one wish, for any reason, it’s always that some genius scientist figures out a cure for my son’s chronic disease. We continue to participate in his treatments and research through Covid-19. And to appreciate organizations like Nephcure who remain focused on the end game, even in the toughest of times. Which is not at all nerve-wrecking. Not at all. So yeah, I’ll take cures for AJ’s disease, Pandemic Viruses, and hell, while I’m asking, all illness. That would be totally amazing.

3. The Dog: My girls share a birthday; two days before Mother’s Day. And their brother wants to get them the dog, by then. The dog is coming. But by Friday? I don’t know, AJ. Working on it. For birthdays this Friday, we have a B Plan: a reverse, driveby, where we do the masked-in-the-car-driving-by, scavenger-hunt-style. So there’s that. And all I can say here is thank God for Shana Auntie, b/c when I got exhausted, she picked-up the go-big-baton and is taking it next level for her drive by. Guys, I just can’t do next-level right now. So just A-freaking-men for her and Raines and Pax having the energy and the great socially distanced, safe ideas for the girls’ birthdays. And fingers crossed for the dog thing too while a mom (and her son) are wishing.

4. Love that can be bought: I’m fairly certain that my kids have zero idea that Mother’s Day is happening this year, let alone, so soon. And that’s ok. Just that they will be with me is the real gift. We have a gift for my own mother who has taken a very Jackie O approach to this whole scarf/face mask thing. It’s a scarf that I forgot to give her at Christmas, two years ago, so there’s that. If gifts were really in the cards (and my kids had trust funds or were independently wealthy,) this dream clutch, this twist top, this watch in rose, and these dress-up at home Birks are currently on my hot wish list.

Tiarra’s Actual Mother’s Day Wishlist

  1. A slow morning: I can’t make up my mind on my brunch menu, but I know I want my morning to start with a workout and end with a mimosa and a nap.
  2. Time to get glammed up (with no place to go): I’ve not had a single videoconference since I began working from home (a miracle, I know), so I’m in the mood for putting on one of my fav lipsticks and a cute outfit.
  3. A few hours with a good book and Netflix: Ali Wong’s “Dear Girls” is a hilarious read; I’m about halfway through. I also want to binge “Workin’ Moms” and have a good cry watching Michelle Obama’s special, “Becoming,” both on Netflix.
  4. A new comforter: We have our separate blankets under the comforter, which is truly a game changer. BUT, waking up in the middle of the night only half comforter’d is still annoying. I’m working on the room design, so something simple will do for now and for the sake of my marriage…

Happy Mother’s Day, Mamas.

Xo,

S & Team TME

18 COMMENTS

  1. Okay, well, the end of this should just be MIC. DROP. Right from the get-go, I felt you all: the groans about Mother’s Day. WORD. And then? I smiled and nodded and laughed and empathized and felt the feels with literally EVERY SINGLE ONE of you. How are you all so amazing, so able to hit all the notes and speak to all of us so well right now? Thank you, yet again, for the hundredth time, for all of your unique and beautiful voices, and for your solidarity in this time. And I appreciate how much of a lift it probably is to even, like, come up with a coherent piece of writing, let alone one written with humor, truth and grace. Kudos to all of you–and thank you again.

  2. THANK YOU for helping me actually sit down and think about what I would like for Mother’s Day this year. And I’m going to ask for it.

    1. I stay in bed. While I watch a movie, Bravo Show, or read a book, you bring me coffee.

    2. Clean the house. Really clean the house. All THE THINGS get put away. And then scrub under them all really well.

    Simple, but I want it.

  3. Shana, breaking news:
    …” as of the morning of Friday, May 8, the Boroughs of Avalon and Stone Harbor on the 7 Mile Beach will be uniform in a beach access policy. There will be access to our beaches for walking, running, fishing and surfing, from dawn to dusk. There will be no stationary activity on the beach for the time being (chairs, blankets, etc). Social distancing regulations must be followed.”

  4. Ah. I love this all. A, my heart hurts a little when I read your part. You make me realize I take my kids for granted. I’m always thinking how great it would be if they went somewhere else once in awhile, but it’s a lot harder than that in reality. I’m sorry for your struggles, but thanks for locking my ass a little and making me realize how lucky I am. Also, that picture of the four of you is awesome. I love everything about it. As for me, for Mother’s Day, I asked for a really nice lounger for my yard. I anticipate a lot of time spent at home this summer. I would love a nice place to hang and take naps in the sun. I was not subtle about my request, so…fingers crossed!!! Happy Mother’s Day, mamas.

    • Elizabeth: Woman. We feel all the feels, all of us. If we didn’t feel the ones that hurt and make us pause we’d never appreciate the other ones, right? And we all also feel what we feel in our reality, that’s different for all of us! So let’s just plan like Philly girls do, optimistically…pencil me in for someday, when social distancing is in our past, and you DO have kids, and I DON’T have kids, and you need to get away, and I’d love some company, and our different needs can bring us together for a nice long patio sit. For real. Pencil it somewhere to give us hope, and it will happen eventually. For now, I have fingers crossed for your very fancy lounger and can’t wait for the moments of peace and joy it brings you. All love woman, all love. Hug those kiddos twice today, just because you can, even though they didn’t do their school work. You can run away from them for a well earned break another day. xoxo A

  5. Great article….A, best of luck to your son, I will keep him in my prayers. Rest assured, they are “sort of” little now but someday, they will realize why you fought to keep them to yourself. Don’t feel guilty about that, your intentions are obvious and not at all selfish….you’ve got the right intent…them…keep on, it will come back to you someday…I promise that….

    • Bernadette: I will take ALL the prayers always, with HUGE gratitude. So thank you for them lady! Thank you also for what felt like a hug in this comment; when I get hugs, in any form, it reenergizes whatever it is in me that also wants to give more of them. xoxo A

  6. Scotti, I love the necklace you picked out.  I recently discovered Gldn and ordered a small, personalized necklace from them…haven’ gotten it yet but if it’s anything like the earrings I bought from them for my mom for Mother’s Day it will be beautiful.  If you haven’t checked them out I highly recommend you do .  Also a wonderful company that gives back.

  7. I’m here for the realness of this post. From the humor to the honest reflections it’s everything I needed this morning. A, thank you for sharing and for being vulnerable with all of us, and for the information on Nephcare.

  8. Laura, where did you get your black bomber jacket? And your daughter’s denim bomber jacket with a star. You guys are adorable.

  9. I loved this so much. Such great ideas! Annmarie, you literally brought tears to my eyes. Sending you a virtual hug! Scottie, I’m obsessed with G’s outfit! Metallica t, puffball headband and emoji leggings-killed it! You guys give me life every day! Happy Mamas Day!

  10. My sons birthday is on Mother’s Day this year AND he is turning 10 so I’m trying to make it a very special day for him. I’ve accepted that I will be overshadowed.

    I really loved this article…it was nice to hear just your regular voices and very normal wants all in one place.

  11. Cams, thank you so much for that music rec! The whole fam has been enjoying Rachel and Vilray ever since I read this post and started playing it. Any more you guys have, bring ‘em on! But in the meantime, wanted to thank you for that delightful rec!

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