Weekend 10.7


I’ve been really committed to not being that parent. The one who gets wayyyy too into the outcome of whatever sport their kid is playing, or the one who thinks their kid is Olympic-bound (let’s do the math on that, shall we?), or the parent who happily crosses over the line of good sportsmanship in order to be “supportive”.

A special side-eye to the Dad screaming in joy at his son’s singles tennis match. I mean ok, your kid had a bunch of good shots, but did you check out the face of the other 9-year-old on the court? Oof. I think that maybe adults should just never cheer against children. As a personal policy. Ya know?

In any case, thus far, my kids have made it pretty easy to be judge-y of other sports parents by picking sports I know absolutely nothing about. I am a horribly mediocre skier, so even when my kids were racing, every single competitor (even the, uh, 5 year olds) were far (FAR!!) better skiers than I’ll ever hope to be. And that has only compounded now that they’ve moved to freestyle events. The scoring of those events, the tricks themselves, the lingo – I know none of it. My competition day vocabulary literally consists of, “Yay!! You did that!!” and/or “Are you hungry?”

There was one blip while Raines played soccer last year – I played in elementary & middle, so obviously fancy myself a bit of an expert – when I found myself actually yelling on the sidelines. I mean…encouraging words, but still. Yelling. Mike was all, ‘Babe. Tighten it up’ so that was embarrassing.

But this year, one of Raines’ buddies convinced him to join the Cross-Country team. And if there is one sport in the whole wide world that I do, in fact, know something about…it’s cross-country.

I may not be able to hide my crazy.

But I’ve been trying. And so far, I’ve been really good! Frankly, Cross-Country is a terrible sport to participate in. I mean OK: there’s good stuff, like the getting in shape, testing your limits, and the camaraderie of the team…but that camaraderie – and, frankly, the resulting self-confidence of doing this sport – is very hard won.

Cross-Country races, if you’ve never tried them, are pure hell. As I recall, it was basically 20-ish minutes of wishing a car would hit me so I could stop running. And I was one of the top finishers! Cross-Country is just as much a mental game as it is a physical one, and learning to control my mind – zone out to the pain – was one of the hardest lessons to learn.

I sent Scotti, my sister (who also ran Cross-Country in high school) a video of the start of one of Raines’ races. “OMG,” She texted back, immediately. “I just got stressed out.”

It’s this mental game, however, that Raines seems to love. He’s been training hard, and pushing himself, and – just like Scotti and I – getting completely stressed out the day before the race. “I just know…I just know how much it’s gonna hurt tomorrow, Mom.” he’ll say, shaking his head. And that’s the thing: you do know. No matter how much you train, on race day, there will be pain. And how much pain you are willing to deal with in that moment determines how well you do in that race.

I think the memory of this pain, and the process of dealing with it – week after week after week – is why I’ve been able to dial any sort of pressure or expectation way back. I remember failing in this sport, too, and I want to make sure he understands that failure – whether in the form of bad days, bad races, slow times – are just as much a part of this sport as everything else, and, in fact, just as valuable (if not more so).

Sports are not for winning. They’re for trying to win, and learning so much more about yourself in the process.

Or, as my Dad used to say, “Go hard. Shake it off.”

Ok Sorel. Are these my winter boots this year??? The brown is cool, but I’m really intrigued by the light beige – with either the lime green or bright orange bottoms. They’re like the Hokas of snow boots and there’s something deeply exciting about this idea. There’s also a black/pink which feels fresh, too, and would go nicely with my black/pink North Face puffer – oh! just restocked. Ooo…

Wait – Plaid? Soooo…plaid shirts have not been on my radar for a minute, but this one made me gasp out loud. In the brown color, tho, not the white.

Classic wool coats, on sale. Honestly, these things are really hard to find on sale, especially if you want a good neutral. But this Vince overcoat just hit Saks Off in “wine” and it’s perfect. I’ve found that oxblood (or wine) coats are actually much easier to style than black, which is a little overwhelming as a wool coat. If you have your heart set on tan, this Vince wrap coat still has a few sizes left, or this Proenza Schouler is a whopping 83% off.

Best jeans under $100. Social Threads sent over these wide-leg jeans and they are fantastic. Suuuper soft, stretchy, but completely nails that old-school, vintage 70’s look. Once again, I’m confused by how much I love a pair of under-$100 jeans. (You can see them on me in this IG reel, if so inclined.)

Best jeans for around $300. I know, I know but these stunning Mother Denim jeans made my jaw drop. Wow.

Head’s up. This Vuori jacket is the greatest thing I’ve put on my body in a looooong time. Article coming soon, but you heard it here first. (I have it in ‘black heather’ and also the model photos are so underwhelming I’m confused. Ignore them.)

Soooo much regret. Last year, I bought Lululemon’s new, shorter Scuba hoodie & matching sweatpants – which are both great! – but in a dark pink I think was called ‘raspberry’. Sigh. And while it is very pretty with my skin tone, it may surprise no one that after the initial excitement died down, I am rarely in Let’s Wear This Matching Raspberry Pink Sweatsuit kind of mood. And now Lulu has come out with matching wide-leg sweatpants and good grief why didn’t I just buy the black?? Or the navy??? Or even….the gray?? Gahhhh LEARN FROM MY MISTAKES, Gang.

Plus size pick. This wide-leg, wine-colored sweatsuit at Good American is so freaking cool. Reads more like a neutral than my raspberry nonsense, but is still a really pretty color. The pants are here and it also comes with an LA sweatshirt if you’re more of a West Coast kind of girl.

Samba dupe. Adidas sambas still sold out? Try these.

Worth the hat hair. I can’t believe how cute baseball hats are with everything right now. And this cashmere one at Quince looks really luxe, but is only $50.

Outfit inspo. I want to re-create this outfit exactly. While the turtleneck isn’t totally required, I do love that cardigan + broken-in denim pairing. But, once again, we are at this frustrating point where we need to know: WHAT JEANS IS SHE ACTUALLY WEARING? These Levi’s are close, but almost sold out. Alex Mill, on their own website, sources vintage Levi’s, but it’s a whole process to get a pair. I suspect…well. I think she’s wearing men’s Levis. I’m tempted to order these (in ‘blue-eyed baby’ wash) to see if I can get a similar vibe. I think GAP does the same thing with their models, too. (And these are the GAP men’s jeans I think we should try.)

Every time. Amazon is doing some sort of “Big Deals Day” next week (kinda like Prime Day), and, true to form, deals have already started. Which means that I am, once again, seriously considering The Roomba. I don’t know what it is about this little robot vacuum, but I like to look at it every Prime Day (and, apparently, on ‘Big Deals Day’). Per usual, I will bring it up to Mike (who doesn’t care), research it online, add to cart, remove from cart, get distracted, miss the sale, and repeat next year. That said…it’s 35% off so seriously: is it worth it???!! Talk to me.

You Tubin’. Similar to our baggy jeans styling efforts, the team came together to try and figure out the best ways to wear Nike Dunks (or Jordans), inspired by all of the French girls wearing them. This quick video of 8 looks is a little sneak peek (and these green-and-white satin Dunks are kiiiind of amazing.) Anyway. More soon.

Yums. Well, I’m off to make this Vegan Pumpkin Sheet Cake. And if you don’t follow Jessica, I highly recommend her vegan recipes – she’s one of my favs. I’m not-so-patiently waiting for her to come out with a cookbook. Someday? Fingers crossed.




  1. We have two Roombas. One for downstairs (named Rhonda, like, help me?) and one for upstairs (named Ramen, by my 11 year old who doesn’t know why “Help me, Rhonda” is funny). They are good for leaving in a room to clean a well defined area- but they don’t do as great at fully cleaning a whole area.

  2. I love/hate my Roomba. It’s nice to turn it on and mostly tune it out but I haaate moving furniture before I use it. (Chairs up off the floor, dog beds, etc). That part is so annoying to me that I never do it and stopped using the Roomba for a long time. Now I run it once or twice a week, don’t move any furniture out of the way and spot vacuum as needed. Plus our dog is terrified of it.

    Personally I’d skip it. Unless the above doesn’t bother you.

  3. I love our Roomba, named Steve. I let Steve do the floors while I clean other parts of the house and it feels like we are a pretty good team! It is not perfect at all: gets stuck, parts wear out, etc, but if you have seasonal allergies, it helps so much to just keep the pollen and allergens down in the house!

  4. Hi Shana, I’ve been following you all for years now. Where did 10 years go? Quick request: Can you review shapewear like Spanz, Honeylove and Skims???? Thanks!!!

  5. The jeans are just straight up vintage men’s Levi’s. They can be found at flea markets or thrift stores or even Etsy/eBay if you don’t feel compelled to try them on. You can tell by the wrinkled leather tag on the back. I’ve purchased many pairs at thrift stores and will sometimes take them to a tailor to get a perfect fit around the bum. No new pair is going to mimic that awesome old distressing and worn-in patina.

  6. Oh my goodness my Roomba is my BEST FRIEND. Her name is Ruby. I did the subscription from iRobot directly bc I wasn’t sure. Now I get new vacuum bags and filters automatically delivered just as Ruby needs them. With three indoor cats three dogs two crumb-dropping children Ruby is fantastic. She runs 3 time/day—kitchen at 9, living areas at 2 and my bedroom and bathroom at 5 just before I get home at 6. No more crunchy floors! She has technology that enables her to avoid obstacles (chairs, cords, *cat v*mit) so we don’t get stuck or make bad decisions. Go Ruby! I love the Rhonda name tho—very clever.

  7. Regarding the Roomba…I have one, but don’t use it nearly as much as I thought I would because my downstairs is open and it just meanders around, never getting to the areas I really need it to. Also, a neighbor’s house was destroyed by fire when their Roomba caught fire while charging. Don’t leave it constantly plugged in.

  8. Shana, as one former cross-country mom to another, I have to say you just wrote one of the best descriptions of our crazy sport that I’ve ever seen. You totally hit the nail on the head. I sent it to my husband (a tennis player). His reply: “If it’s terrible I don’t understand why you all chose to do it!“ Yeah, hard to explain. But there’s something there. Thanks!

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