Weekend 6.5

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I’ve been avoiding tricky topics. Not for lack of caring but — quite frankly — I’m overwhelmed. Every morning as I scroll through the news, reading about the latest legislative clap-backs from red states…I find myself more and more depressed. From the bizarre loosening of gun laws (no background checks? Um…why?) despite decades of evidence showing how well sensible gun laws work, to the even more bizarre laws against mask-wearing (we hate doctors now?)…from the heartbeat laws banning abortions as early as 6 weeks — even in the case of rape or incest (and many states still grant rapists parental rights, FYI) —  to the voter suppression laws and blatant gerrymandering that are so obviously designed to thwart the will of the people. It’s depressing.

Thwarting the will of the people, I suppose, is about as American as it gets. Only 6% of Americans were eligible to vote in our first-ever election, so it looks like the old, rich, white-guy system is still pretty much working as designed?

Or perhaps it’s not working exactly as designed. Sixty percent of eligible voters did vote in the last election — and I suppose that could explain this rash of fearful lawmaking from predominately old, rich white guys.

It’s starting to sound pretty Handmaid’s Tale up in here.

And I’m also bummed out by the influencer community pleading on IG for “grace” and “understanding” for their silence on what I see as social justice issues. “You can’t know what we’re doing behind closed doors!” they cry, and while I get that — I do — it still feels like a blow.  

Hypocritically, in almost the same breath, I was completely annoyed by a few recent emails/comments directed my way, telling us that our silence on anti-Semitism was “deafening”.

Huh?

Well let me clear that right up: We have no patience for hate crimes of any kind, nor will we tolerate any hate, violence, intimidation, or oppression of any group of people.  

Anti-Semitism is NOT ok. 

But it’s interesting that I was simultaneously judging others for their silence while annoyed at being judged for ours.

Underneath my initial annoyed reaction to being “called out” (or whatever) is a deep discomfort. This discomfort stems from shame, and I have no patience for shame-based anything…likely the reason for my annoyance. But neither do I want to call for an end to call-out culture. Instead, these comments (annoying as they may be) often serve as a good (necessary?) reminder that our world isn’t fair or equatable and that I do have a role to play.  

We all do. We can help bring about change, or we can stay silent. Both are an active choice. 

I think it’s time we embrace the uncomfortable. Our feelings of discomfort are not bad feelings, they are the feelings that will cause us to question what we thought we knew, to think openly about another’s lived experience, to be curious. 

We’re not always going to get it right over here. But we will keep trying. I may always be annoyed if/when you call us out, but like John Lewis’ idea of “good trouble”, I’m going to try and embrace some good discomfort.


Beach hats for big heads. We’re heading to Carolina Beach in a couple of weeks, and instead of just squinting for a while and then stealing Mike’s hat…I just ordered my own. This fedora is super cute (and actually a men’s hat, haha, which explains why it fits), but this Patagonia visor was the big surprise. Super adjustable, and looks good with my messy beach bun.

Need a rashguard? OMG THIS ONE. I have the size medium, and will be wearing it with a black bikini. Obsessed.

Found: the cutest t-shirt dress. Despite the fact that I carry weight in my middle…the cut-outs on this Good American t-shirt dress are geniusly placed. I don’t even understand why it looks so freaking good. Wearing a size small (and I’ll shoot it soon).

I get what the fuss is about. I just got an Apple watch (this one) and it’s….pretty freaking fantastic. YOU WERE RIGHT, MIKE.

Looks like Vince. I just ordered these slide sandals in beige. They look like a pair of Vince slides, but they’re only $59, made from real leather, and have great reviews. Confused? Me too.

Also, these. I had been stalking these comfy UGG Sandals in tan…but they’re sold out in my size. Zappos, however, looks fully stocked. Anyone else having a hard time finding cute sandals in stock??? Those things must be flying off shelves.

Fav picnic salad. Mike’s cousin Nat used to make a picnic salad she called “Orzo With Everything”. I had the recipe (we LOVED it)….but haven’t been able to find my copy. However, after lots of searching…FOUND IT. Ignore the photo — it’s prettier in real life (AND delicious). The salad can be made vegan by omitting the parmesan cheese and adding a little more salt and pepper.

So much for small government. This Atlantic article is a pretty good summary of the legislative changes being made in red states by Trump’s new GOP.

Power move. I LOVED this NYT article about tennis star Naomi Osaka and her decision to withdraw from the French Open after getting flack for refusing to speak to the press. “When the system hasn’t historically stood for you, why sacrifice yourself to uphold it?” After reading pieces like this, it gives me hope that change is coming.

xo,

S

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Shana founded The Mom Edit in 2008. She lives with the love of her life (his name's Mike) and their two crazy boys in downtown Philadelphia. She loves a good styling challenge (her engineering side shows eventually), appreciates kindness, and usually picks scotch over wine, sneakers over stilettos, and shorts known as denim-underwear, always.

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8 COMMENTS

  1. First of all, thank you for your honesty and openness, as always. I’m Jewish and it did not occur to me that anyone was being silent about anything… because you’ve mentioned your team’s stance on all things before. I kinda thought it was well known? Perhaps others didn’t know that. “We have no patience for hate crimes of any kind, nor will we tolerate any hate, violence, intimidation, or oppression of any group of people. ” — that’s your stance and I am always here for that… as should everyone be. Thirdly — I have huge love for Ugg sandals. I have a pair that is about 10 years old now and they’re starting to wear out. I will probably cry when they die… so everyone should remember Uggs for sandals… just just booties! Much love to you all, TME team.

  2. What I find more disturbing then the old white men putting forth these laws, (which is to be expected,) are the staggering numbers that still support and encourage them. This is our country…our fellow Americans…

  3. Shana you might appreciate the podcast Pod Save America. Very funny & irreverent former Obama bros, still very much plugged into politics. Watch the F bombs around your kiddos. They have a url, VoteSaveAmerica, with lots of ways to help preserve and improve our democracy, to contribute and get involved. They give me hope.

  4. Love your note on staying in uncomfortable here. At this point I just don’t know what else we need to say. “Stop being jerks” comes to mind. However, when I see something I do say something. I say it loud and clear. I also go a step further and make sure our systems in place know about it so that change can happen. But then I don’t post about it. Mainly because I don’t want the whole pat on the back for doing the right thing. I don’t need another pat on the back. My back is fine. I don’t know what the right answer is for things like this. Doing the right thing without posting about it seems to come to mind but then again if we don’t post about it we can’t inspire others. I would love more thoughts about this.

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