Gift Guide For The Mom Who Is Sleeping Through The Night For The First Time In Ten Years

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The boys were walking ahead of Mike and I, bouncing their way to school.  They were with their friends, and, at times, had their arms slung around each other, only removing an arm to animatedly make a point.  They looked like miniature teenagers, full of jokes and boasts and teasing. It was adorable.

“You know,” Mike began.  Hesitated.  “Parenting strikes me as this constant process of loss and gain.  You know?  Every day I get to know our boys better – I mean, who they are now – but there’s always this sense of loss, too. We’ve already lost the baby parts of them, and pretty soon they’re going to be–  Oh, sorry babe.  I didn’t mean to make you cry.”

Too late.  I was on the sidewalk, frozen, with a hand clutched to my heart.  Mike’s words had struck a chord –  parenting is a constant process of loss.  And, as our boys get older, life does get more and more fun (that’s the gain, I suppose), but I’ve been feeling this sense of loss acutely.  I’ve always had this sort of desperation about me as a mother – a Please Time Just Stop kind of vibe that always made me go back in for one more mummy cuddle, to pick up and carry a tired boy even though he is almost as tall as me, and reading one more book at night.  Ten years as a mother, and I still remain powerless to resist these things.

On the upside, Mike recently pointed out, in addition to the skiing and the travel that we’ve been doing…no one has peed in our bed as of late.  And as much as parenting is a constant process of loss and gain, it is also a constant process of sleeping and peeing and staggering around at 3AM for a towel.  (Do you guys change the sheets in the middle of the night?  We did exactly NEVER.)

So we’ve begun the process of taking back our bedroom.  The room that was once filled with diapers and wipes and nipple shields and breast pumps and butt cream and various bottles (none of which worked) and spit rags and changing pads and teething tablets (that have since been pulled #oops) and books on parenting and then later pee-stained sheets and towels and spiderman underwear and legos and a stack of books to read aloud…..

….is now mostly just filled with us.  Mike and I.  Our stuff.  The boys still come running in on weekend mornings sometimes, for mummy cuddles, and they still go through clingy phases now and again which results in a night-time visitor (which I love)…..but those are becoming increasingly rare.  Most of the time I fall asleep putting the boys to bed (I can’t seem to resist that request for one more book, nor can I stay awake for it), and when I eventually come-to and stagger out to find Mike…..the boys mostly just stay where I left them.

So it’s time.  It’s time to swap out the pee-stained mattress (which, if I’m being completely honest I can still smell on a warm day OMG), and it’s time that I added a few adult touches to my bedroom. (I suspect that means something completely different to Mike, haha.)

In honor of being a Mama for ten years, and sleeping peacefully through the night for the first time in a decade….here is my own personal Christmas list.

 

TOP

1. Real Silk Pajamas Because #noPee

Fleur du Mal Silk Cami & Shorts, $248 and $128

There’s no doubt that real silk pajamas are a huge splurge.  But I’ve been dying over this insanely pretty set from Fleur du Mal that easily doubles as sexy lingerie (or check out this red silk set for a slightly lower alternative, or if you don’t care about silk, this velvet set from Madewell is stunning).  I just add cozy cardigans and legwarmers to warm it up on winter mornings.  Speaking of which….

2. Legwarmers

Free People Pirouette Legwarmers, $38

I’m obsessed with legwarmers-as-pajamas.  First of all, they look surprisingly sexy with little PJ shorts (even flannel ones) and second of all, they don’t get all twisted up in the covers as you sleep.  Plus, they’re easy to skooch off in the middle of the night if you get too hot AND if you have permanently cold feet, pulling them over your ice-cold toes works better than socks.  (But probs not better than your husband’s warm back.)

3.  A Romantic Light Over My Adult Bed

Feather Light, $490

For Christmas one year, my friend Jayme got an incredible light fixture.  Her husband bought it and had it installed in the bedroom.  It dramatically changed the space, and always struck me as an incredibly romantic gift.  My bestie, A, just found this feather light fixture and it’s giant and stunning.  I mean…it’s made of feathers.  SWOON.

4. Obviously, a Cashmere Sweatsuit

Everlane cashmere sweatshirt and sweatpants, $140 each

The only thing that could make me wear sweatpants even more than I do now is to make them out of cashmere. I die.  I can just see myself now, slouching around the house on a Saturday, swathed in nothing but drapey and cozy fabulousness.  With my morning coffee and chocolate.

Who am I kidding?  It would be a Tuesday, I’d be making lunches and wearing the damn sweatsuit to school drop-off and would still be in it when Mike came home from work that night.

5.  I Like My Slippers Like My Friends:  Slightly Crazy

UGG Fluff Momma Mongolian Clog slippers, $150

Where do I even begin with these?  Maybe with the name, “Fluff Momma,” or perhaps that I miiiiight be able to pass these off as that pet that Pax so desperately wants or maybe it’s that these slippers either scream Don’t Give a F— Somebody Fill Up My Martini or, and I really can’t decide here, I’ve Given Up Somebody Fill My Martini but either way there’s a martini or a faux pet in all of this craziness so OBVIOUSLY this is yes.

BOTTOM ROW

6. The Kindle To End All Kindles

Kindle Oasis, $250

One might say that I’m a fan of the Kindle.  But they would be wrong:  I am actually a Kindle devotee. And not the Kindle Fire #blasphemy because it’s e-ink or nuthin’ and if you’ve ever experienced the joys of reading your Kindle on the beach, you know what I’m talking about.  The newest Kindle Oasis is perfectly balanced for reading, super light, more evenly lit, WATERPROOF, and with a battery that lasts weeks.  I mean….this is basically porn for reading nerds like me, and I haven’t even opened the book yet.

ps.  If you’ve never had a backlit, e-ink Kindle, I’ve been happily using the Paperwhite for years.  It’s a game changer.

7. Speaking of Porn….This Coffee Maker

Nespresso Vertuo Coffee and Espresso Machine, $250 (but is currently on sale)

We have this exact Nespresso machine.  But I’m including it on my gift guide because I can’t stop pushing it I love it so much.  It makes coffee so rich and so frothy you don’t need milk.  The pods are recyclable (you send them back to Nespresso in the included mailing envelope).   The one downside is that it sounds a bit like a rocket taking off while brewing, but brewing only takes seconds and you learn to recognize the sound for what it is: HAPPINESS.

8. This Water Bottle To Solve Marital Drama

Sovaro water bottle, $35

If you asked Mike what my most annoying trait is….I’d bet good money that it’s when I ask him to get me water.  Um.  Every night.  It is annoying!  I am a horrible person!  I am also a thirsty person, it turns out, in the middle of the night, and it’s cold in this house, and he’s amazing at waking up and being able to fall riiiiight back to sleep.  It’s a special talent of his that shouldn’t be wasted, that’s all I’m saying.  But I’m thinking that this water bottle would be pretty on my nightstand and cut down on those middle-of-the-night water requests.  And because it has a straw, the kids wouldn’t be tempted to throw it into their backpacks where all water bottles go to die.

9. A Watch That’s Both Badass And Timeless

Shinola Muldowney Watch, $900

Named after Shirley Muldowney, the first female drag racer, this watch is seriously stunning on.  It’s neither shiny nor matte, and manages to be both tomboyish and elegant.  It is expensive, but Shinola watches are all made in Detroit, and are of insanely good quality. We’re big Shinola fans here, and I love that they not only made a watch in honor of Ms. Muldowney, but that they nailed her badass, feminine vibe so freaking well.  You can read more about the watch (and the brand) here.  It’s one of the few watches I’ve seen that I actually would wear everyday.

10. A Stunning Ring To Start A Stack

Catbird Three-Step Diamond Ring, $544

I love a bunch of delicately stacked rings, but I wear so little jewelry, that I’d prefer my ring stack to grow over time and be meaningful.  Plus, I love the idea of getting one every year for a holiday or a birthday.  It’s almost better if they don’t perfectly match.  A lower-cost alternative? This woodland ring is a stunner ($210) or this tiny letter ring ($144) can be customized with text.  The one that says “mama” made me tear up, just a little (and is especially sweet layered with the ‘love’ ring).

New mamas, hang in there. Despite the intensity and the sleeplessness….things do get better.  And some things?  The other, sweet things?  Like the smell of your baby and the way their thighs squish between your fingers?  Well.  Someday you’ll remember those things unexpectedly, all in a rush, while looking a ring that says, “mama”.

xo,

S

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About Author

Shana founded The Mom Edit in 2008. She lives with the love of her life (his name’s Mike) and their two crazy boys in downtown Philadelphia. She loves a good styling challenge (her engineering side shows eventually), appreciates kindness, and usually picks scotch over wine, sneakers over stilettos, and denim-underwear, always.

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13 Comments

  1. I feel your pain Shana! My only daughter is 12 years old and I filled up yesterday when I saw Santa outside of Nordstrom yesterday….and again when I put the Christmas tree in the stand while she was at school. I couldn’t wait to show her when she got home late after sports. My little lady glanced at it…said it was beautiful and I got a “nice job Mom!” as she departed to her room to do “a ton” of homework—-whhaaa……I miss the magic Mama!!

  2. Oh the pee! We always doubled up our kids bed. Water protector sheet water protector sheet so you could just peel one layer off in the middle of the night and not have to put a new set of sheets back on. Maybe this would’ve worked for your bed too? We’ve never had a pee stained or smelled mattress because we always used those mattress protector pads on all our beds.

  3. Same here 10 years of pee, don’t worry you’ll get through it, we as mom’s always dig deep and find the energy somehow. i survived with the extra layer of water proof sheets and a water proof mattress protector, no pee smell, yay! Like your selections!
    i always have a glass of water next to my bed, every night : )

  4. I love this post. My boys are about 3 years younger and it’s like looking into a future I can almost touch.
    Funny observation – it seems like the majority (or at least a high minority) of your recommendations come with some sort of justification for the price. I appreciate high quality items but if you feel the need to justify the price so much, maybe the items are too high priced for your viewership.
    I like to spend good money on good stuff (meaning, I’m known for being a big spender) but I wouldn’t pay so high a price for most of these recommendations. I feel like there are plenty of lower priced versions that would totally pass my quality standards.

  5. This is a good reminder to cherish the middle of the night wake ups and cries of “mama” that inevitably lead to me falling asleep in my four year old’s bed at 2am and staying there until morning.

  6. I loved how personal this gift guide was: Really engaging writing. Even if the actual items aren’t something I need, I still enjoyed reading through the whole thing for the sweet reflections about motherhood and the shifting seasons therein.

  7. Yes! Let’s start calling it an Amazon Tablet. I’ve had so many conversations lately where people think I’m talking about reading on an Amazon tablet when I’m really talking about my Paperwhite.

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